Tuesday, December 23, 2008

The way to my heart...

I'm pretty sure I have written about these geese before. These geese are lawn decorations that you can dress up in different outfits. Um, I need these BBQ-ing geese on my lawn. BBQ-ING GEESE! They could become friends with the flamingos out there.


Friday, December 12, 2008

Turn it up

My house came with a 70+ year old oil boiler. It was prone to breaking down, and did quite often resulting in me developing the habit of running around all the time, touching all the radiators in my house to see if he was still working. He. His name was Orville and he was my "bastard in the basement." All he did was not work and cost me money. heh.

Well, this year I kicked him out and got a brand new gas boiler. It's now nice and toasty in my little bungalow... which last winter was something I never experienced. Orville broke down over eight times last winter, and so I had to get rid of him.

When he was working, Orville was so loud that you could feel it sputtering and rumbling in the living room. The new boiler is very quiet, which is new to me.. I'm used to being able to tell if the heat is on by sound.

It's odd having a reliable heating system. Now what am I going to bitch about all winter?

Another article...

Click the article and you'll be able to read it.

Sad news.

1950s pinup model Bettie Page dies in LA at 85

LOS ANGELES (AP) — Bettie Page, the 1950s secretary-turned-model whose controverisal photographs in skimpy attire or none at all helped set the stage for the 1960s sexual revolution, died Thursday. She was 85.

Page suffered a heart attack last week in Los Angeles and never regained consciousness, her agent Mark Roesler said. Before the heart attack, Page had been hospitalized for three weeks with pneumonia.

"She captured the imagination of a generation of men and women with her free spirit and unabashed sensuality," Roesler said. "She is the embodiment of beauty."

Page, who was also known as Betty, attracted national attention with magazine photographs of her sensuous figure in bikinis and see-through lingerie that were quickly tacked up on walls in military barracks, garages and elsewhere, where they remained for years.

Her photos included a centerfold in the January 1955 issue of then-fledgling Playboy magazine, as well as controversial sadomasochistic poses.

The latter helped contribute to her mysterious disappearance from the public eye, which lasted decades and included years during which she battled mental illness and became a born-again Christian.

After resurfacing in the 1990s, she occasionally granted interviews but refused to allow her picture to be taken.
"I don't want to be photographed in my old age," she told an interviewer in 1998. "I feel the same way with old movie stars. ... It makes me sad. We want to remember them when they were young."

The 21st century indeed had people remembering her just as she was. She became the subject of songs, biographies, Web sites, comic books, movies and documentaries. A new generation of fans bought thousands of copies of her photos, and some feminists hailed her as a pioneer of women's liberation.

Gretchen Mol portrayed her in 2005's "The Notorious Bettie Page" and Paige Richards had the role in 2004's "Bettie Page: Dark Angel." Page herself took part in the 1998 documentary "Betty Page: Pinup Queen."

Her career began one day in October 1950 when she took a respite from her job as a secretary in a New York office for a walk along the beach at Coney Island. An amateur photographer named Jerry Tibbs admired the 27-year-old's firm, curvy body and asked her to pose.

Looking back on the career that followed, she told Playboy in 1998, "I never thought it was shameful. I felt normal. It's just that it was much better than pounding a typewriter eight hours a day, which gets monotonous."

Nudity didn't bother her, she said, explaining: "God approves of nudity. Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, they were naked as jaybirds."

In 1951, Page fell under the influence of a photographer and his sister who specialized in S&M. They cut her hair into the dark bangs that became her signature and posed her in spiked heels and little else. She was photographed with a whip in her hand, and in one session she was spread-eagled between two trees, her feet dangling.
"I thought my arms and legs would come out of their sockets," she said later.

Moralists denounced the photos as perversion, and Sen. Estes Kefauver of Tennessee, Page's home state, launched a congressional investigation.

Page quickly retreated from public view, later saying she was hounded by federal agents who waved her nude photos in her face. She also said she believed that, at age 34, her days as "the girl with the perfect figure" were nearly over.

She moved to Florida in 1957 and married a much younger man, as an early marriage to her high school sweetheart had ended in divorce. Her second marriage also failed, as did a third, and she suffered a nervous breakdown.

In 1959, she was lying on a sea wall in Key West when she saw a church with a white neon cross on top. She walked inside and became a born-again Christian.

After attending Bible school, she wanted to serve as a missionary but was turned down because she had been divorced. Instead, she worked full-time for evangelist Billy Graham's ministry.

A move to Southern California in 1979 brought more troubles.
She was arrested after an altercation with her landlady, and doctors who examined her determined she had acute schizophrenia. She spent 20 months in a state mental hospital in San Bernardino.

A fight with another landlord resulted in her arrest, but she was found not guilty because of insanity. She was placed under state supervision for eight years.

"She had a very turbulent life," Todd Mueller, a family friend and autograph seller, told The Associated Press on Thursday. "She had a temper to her."

Mueller said he first met Page after tracking her down in the 1990s and persuaded her to do an autograph signing event.
He said she was a hit and sold about 3,000 autographs, usually for $200 to $300 each.

"Eleanor Roosevelt, we got $40 to $50. ... Bettie Page outsells them all," he told The AP last week.

Born April 22, 1923, in Nashville, Tenn., Page said she grew up in a family so poor "we were lucky to get an orange in our Christmas stockings."

The family included three boys and three girls, and Page said her father molested all of the girls.

After the Pages moved to Houston, her father decided to return to Tennessee and stole a police car for the trip. He was sent to prison, and for a time Betty lived in an orphanage.

In her teens she acted in high school plays, going on to study drama in New York and win a screen test from 20th Century Fox before her modeling career took off.

Associated Press writer Raquel Maria Dillon in Los Angeles contributed to this report.

Sunday, December 07, 2008

Oh Dear.

Pinup Bettie Page Hospitalized After Heart Attack


LOS ANGELES (AP) -- Bettie Page, a 1950s pinup known for her raven-haired bangs and saucy come-hither looks, was hospitalized in intensive care after suffering a heart attack, her agent said Friday.

''She's critically ill,'' Mark Roesler of CMG Worldwide told The Associated Press.

He said the 85-year-old had been hospitalized for the last three weeks with pneumonia and was about to be released when she had the heart attack Tuesday. Page was transferred to another hospital in Los Angeles and remained in intensive care Friday.

A family friend, Todd Mueller, said Page was in a coma. When asked to confirm, Roesler said, ''I would not deny that,'' but he would not comment further on her condition.

Page, a secretary turned model, is credited with helping set the stage for the sexual revolution of the rebellious 1960s. She attracted national attention with magazine photographs of her sensuous figure that were tacked up on walls across the country.

Her photos included a centerfold in the January 1955 issue of then-fledgling Playboy magazine, as well as controversial sadomasochistic poses.

Page later spent decades away from the public eye, and during that time battled mental illness and became a born-again Christian.

After resurfacing in the 1990s, she occasionally granted interviews but refused to allow her picture to be taken.

Mueller credits his business dealings with Page for bringing her out of seclusion. He said he first met her in 1989 when he offered her ''a bunch of money'' to show up at autograph signings.

''I probably sold 3,000 of her autographs, usually for $200 to $300,'' he said. ''Eleanor Roosevelt, we got $40-$50. ... Bettie Page outsells them all.''

Thursday, December 04, 2008

It's Alive!

The super secret project I've been working on for months and months is live. Right now. Live. It's all very exciting.
It's here..... www.RetroactiveNortheast.com

I still have an entire notebook of links I need to add to the site, so I'll slowly do that in the coming weeks. Some sections are a bit thin.... sorry Pennsylvania!

it should be noted that my friend Chris built the thing from my crazy design files and did all the fancy-pants coding. I could not have done this without her immense help.

Monday, December 01, 2008

We're only in it for the money

I got a love letter from the guuuuvment today...

I got audited by the fucking IRS.

So basically, I can dispute it and then they'll probably crawl right up my ass even further, or I can just shut up and pay what they say I owe.

The funny thing is, I'm being audited for the one year that I had H&R Block do my taxes. Damn them.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008


December Fifth.

That is the day that my super secret project will be done.


And on December 6th my friend is throwing a tiny launch party at Lucky's Lounge. Whhooooo!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Right on.

I saw this last night on television, and luckily someone had the good thought to "youtube clip it" within 24 hours, so that hopefully it can spread like wildfire all over the interwebs. Hooray for technology!

Super secret project and a really good blog....

Soooo, my super secret project is taking a whole hell of a lot longer to finish up than I anticipated, but it will be up soon... and it will be worth it. (at least, I hope so!)

There is not enough time in a day for me to do all the things I want to do.

In other news, I found this blog the other day... and It's really great....

Saturday, November 01, 2008

Black Dahlia

I'm not really a fan of Halloween so usually I just go to whatever party I'm invited to as a 1950s housewife..meaning I just show up in something I'd normally wear.

But this year I decided to actually put a tiny bit of effort into my costume...

Friday, October 31, 2008

And another thing....

Whoever stole my damn pumpkin off my doorstep...
I hope you drop it on yer foot and break a toe or two... you shmuck.

Today is Halloween

I don't really like halloween all that much, but I LOVE zombies.......

DIE YOU ZOMBI​E BASTA​RDS!​ at Cinem​aSale​m on Satur​day night​,​ Novem​ber 1st.

This event​ gets bigge​r and crazi​er by the minut​e.​.​.​ Here'​s what'​s in store​:​

SEE! the film in the compa​ny of hundr​eds of (​Real,​ Live (​?​!​?​!​?​)​)​ ZOMBI​ES from the Salem​ Zombi​e Walk!​

HEAR!​ the World​'​s Great​est surf-​instr​o Misfi​ts cover​ band The Crims​on Ghost​s,​ will play a blazi​ng LIVE SET at 10pm befor​e the movie​!​

SEE! an hones​t to god FREAK​ SHOW!​!​!​ Serio​usly,​ there​'​ll peopl​e hamme​ring nails​ into their​ heads​,​ walki​ng on a bed of nails​,​ swall​owing​ live insec​ts and who knows​ what else.​.​.​

DROOL​!​ The Crims​on Ghost​s will be accom​panie​d by gorge​ously​ grote​sque green​skinn​ed zombi​egirl​ go-​go dance​rs inspi​red by none-​other​-​than the magni​ficen​t Maldo​nato Tripl​ets!​ Oh, BEHAV​E!​

MEET!​ Co-​write​r/​co-​produ​cer Haig Demar​jian along​ with assor​ted Cast and Crew MYSTE​RY GUEST​S.​.​.​ bring​ your DYZB!​ memor​abili​a and get autog​raphs​ for your colle​ction​!​!​!​

BUY! What'​s that you say? You don'​t OWN any rare and colle​ctabl​e DYZB!​ memor​abili​a?​ Don'​t worry​-​-​ that Undea​d Legen​d of Comic​s,​ Hack "​King"​ Derby​,​ has creat​ed an ALL-​NEW colle​ctabl​e poste​r for this SPECI​AL event​-​-​ only avail​able for sale AT the event​!​

WIN! Did we menti​on that there​'​ll be a "​Best Zombi​e"​ COSTU​ME CONTE​ST with CASH PRIZE​S?​?​!​!​?​?​!​

PAY! $10 admis​sion/​ $8 if you'​re dress​ed like a Zombi​e

Sadly, I can't go to this event... Instead, I'll be watching Henry Rollins rant and rave for hours on Saturday evening. But, go go go, if you can... the movie is great!

Monday, October 13, 2008


I haven't updated this blog in a LOOOONG time.

Time for excuses......
I'm neglecting this blog because I've been working on a giant secret project that is almost ready to be revealed.

to tide you over, here is what has happened in the last month or so....
• my house is finally getting a new heating system • dolemite is still an asshole • i'm re-modeling my spare bedroom • a hutch is being built for my kitchen to hide dolemite's litter box... so you could say that his bathroom is getting re-modeled • Myk and Allison got married • my car overheated on the way to Myk's wedding • i've got costochondritis, which means the cartilage around my sternum is strained... it hurts! a lot! • i can survive for 3 months on my apocalypse food ration • spent many sundays at the SOWA open market • pumpkin on my doorstep because it's october • i'm way behind on my laundry •

After my super-secret project is all ready to go, I'll be able to get back to rambling about nothing on this blog.

Monday, September 22, 2008

People of the world....

"Chapstick" is a brand name.

Bag Lunch does not make/sell "Chapstick."

Bag Lunch is lip balm company that makes and sells lip balm... NOT Chapstick.


Friday, September 05, 2008


"​Austi​n Polic​e Say Hit-​and-​Run Drive​r Hit Motor​cycle​”
Fatal​ Motor​cycle​ Wreck​
The motor​cycle​ crash​ed to the front​age road below​ the expre​ssway​.​
Relat​ed Links​
www.​TwoTi​minFo​ur.​ com

A North​ Austi​n motor​cycle​ colli​sion on U.S. Hwy 183 kille​d the rider​ and left his motor​cycle​ on the front​age road -- a mile away from where​ his body was found​.​

Polic​e say Eric Laufe​r,​ 25, died at the scene​.​ Laufe​r was the lead vocal​ist for Two Timin​'​ Four,​ an Austi​n rocka​billy​/​root music​ band.​ The motor​cycle​ was trave​ling north​bound​ at the time of the crash​.​ It happe​ned aroun​d 4 a.m. Thurs​day,​ just east of Burne​t Road on U.S. 183.

Inves​tigat​ors are now looki​ng for the vehic​le they say struc​k the motor​cycle​ and then left the scene​.​

The victi​m was weari​ng a helme​t and other​ prote​ctive​ gear.​

Before they were "Four"...

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Nervous Breakdown. (also i swear a lot in this post... hi Mom!)

My iPod bought the fucking farm. I did everything i could to try and fix it myself. Nothing worked. It's fucking done.

This would normally be horrible and a bother. But this is made especially horrible by the fact that I'm throwing my big end of Summer BBQ tomorrow and now i have a giant Music Problem. You really can't throw a party without music. Really. Try it... your party will crash and burn.

So I need to get this thing fixed.

There are no available "Genius Bar" appointments until Monday. Great. I use my Ipod roughly 4 hours a day. I NEED this thing. Even if i wasn't having a BBQ tomorrow, I would still be freaking out... but probably not as much. Sure, i have a record player, but I can't be flipping records all afternoon while grilling burgers and dogs.

Luckily, my friend Myk is going to come by early tomorrow, load my BBQ playlist onto his iPod and save the fucking day.

Alright, now I gotta go buy a mattress... tax free holiday. whooo.

Friday, August 15, 2008

Time-Warp Wives

This half-hour documentary played on channel 4 in England a few days ago. Luckily, someone posted it on youtube, in three parts...

Monday, August 11, 2008

Night out on the town...

You know that dance that suburban moms do when they have a few too many wine coolers and they are listening to some band play all their favorite covers?

My friend Chris named the dance. It's called "The Minivan."

Wednesday, August 06, 2008

Save Mister Rogers

Apparently, PBS has decided to remove "Mister Rogers' Neighborhood" from it's daily syndicate offerings, beginning in September. Jerks.

for more information regarding this HORRIBLE decision.

Here's a great article I found while rooting around...

(Mental Floss) -- Here are 15 things everyone should know about Fred Rogers:

1. Even Koko the Gorilla loved him. Most people have heard of Koko, the Stanford-educated gorilla who could speak about 1000 words in American Sign Language, and understand about 2000 in English.

What most people don't know, however, is that Koko was an avid Mister Rogers' Neighborhood fan. As Esquire reported, when Fred Rogers took a trip out to meet Koko for his show, not only did she immediately wrap her arms around him and embrace him, she did what she'd always seen him do onscreen: she proceeded to take his shoes off!

2. He made thieves think twice. According to a TV Guide piece on him, Fred Rogers drove a plain old Impala for years. One day, however, the car was stolen from the street near the TV station. When Rogers filed a police report, the story was picked up by every newspaper, radio and media outlet around town.

Amazingly, within 48 hours the car was left in the exact spot where it was taken from, with an apology on the dashboard. It read, "If we'd known it was yours, we never would have taken it." Mental Floss: Memorable commencement speakers

3. He watched his figure to the pound. In covering Rogers' daily routine (waking up at 5 a.m.; praying for a few hours for all of his friends and family; studying; writing, making calls and reaching out to every fan who took the time to write him; going for a morning swim; getting on a scale; then really starting his day), writer Tom Junod explained that Mr. Rogers weighed in at exactly 143 pounds every day for the last 30 years of his life.

He didn't smoke, didn't drink, didn't eat the flesh of any animals, and was extremely disciplined in his daily routine. And while I'm not sure if any of that was because he'd mostly grown up a chubby, single child, Junod points out that Rogers found beauty in the number 143.

According to the piece, Rogers came "to see that number as a gift... because, as he says, "the number 143 means 'I love you.' It takes one letter to say 'I' and four letters to say 'love' and three letters to say 'you.' One hundred and forty-three."

4. He saved both public television and the VCR. Strange but true. When the government wanted to cut public television funds in 1969, the relatively unknown Mister Rogers went to Washington.

Almost straight out of a Frank Capra film, his 5-6 minute testimony on how TV had the potential to give kids hope and create more productive citizens was so simple but passionate that even the most gruff politicians were charmed. While the budget should have been cut, the funding instead jumped from $9 to $22 million.

Rogers also spoke to Congress, and swayed senators into voting to allow VCR's to record television shows from the home. It was a cantankerous debate at the time, but his argument was that recording a program like his allowed working parents to sit down with their children and watch shows as a family. Mental Floss: Forgotten kids shows sure to give you nightmares

5. He might have been the most tolerant American ever. Mister Rogers seems to have been almost exactly the same off-screen as he was onscreen. As an ordained Presbyterian minister, and a man of tremendous faith, Mister Rogers preached tolerance first.

Whenever he was asked to castigate non-Christians or gays for their differing beliefs, he would instead face them and say, with sincerity, "God loves you just the way you are." Often this provoked ire from fundamentalists.

6. He was genuinely curious about others. Mister Rogers was known as one of the toughest interviews because he'd often befriend reporters, asking them tons of questions, taking pictures of them, compiling an album for them at the end of their time together, and calling them after to check in on them and hear about their families. He wasn't concerned with himself, and genuinely loved hearing the life stories of others.

And it wasn't just with reporters. Once, on a fancy trip up to a PBS exec's house, he heard the limo driver was going to wait outside for 2 hours, so he insisted the driver come in and join them (which flustered the host).

On the way back, Rogers sat up front, and when he learned that they were passing the driver's home on the way, he asked if they could stop in to meet his family. According to the driver, it was one of the best nights of his life the house supposedly lit up when Rogers arrived, and he played jazz piano and bantered with them late into the night. Further, like with the reporters, Rogers sent him notes and kept in touch with the driver for the rest of his life.

7. He was color-blind. Literally. He couldn't see the color blue. Of course, he was also figuratively color-blind, as you probably guessed. As were his parents, who took in a black foster child when Rogers was growing up. Mental Floss: Praise for the blind genius who invented cruise control

8. He could make a subway car full of strangers sing. Once while rushing to a New York meeting, there were no cabs available, so Rogers and one of his colleagues hopped on the subway. Esquire reported that the car was filled with people, and they assumed they wouldn't be noticed.

But when the crowd spotted Rogers, they all simultaneously burst into song, chanting "It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood." The result made Rogers smile wide.

9. He got into TV because he hated TV. The first time he turned one on, he saw people angrily throwing pies in each other's faces. He immediately vowed to use the medium for better than that. Over the years he covered topics as varied as why kids shouldn't be scared of a haircut, or the bathroom drain (because you won't fit!), to divorce and war.

10. He was an Ivy League dropout. Rogers moved from Dartmouth to Rollins College to pursue his studies in music.

11. He composed all the songs on the show, and over 200 tunes.

12. He was a perfectionist, and disliked ad libbing. He felt he owed it to children to make sure every word on his show was thought out.

13. Michael Keaton got his start on the show as an assistant. He helped puppeteer and operate the trolley.

14. Several characters on the show are named for his family. Queen Sara is named after Rogers' wife, and the postman Mr. McFeely is named for his maternal grandfather who always talked to him like an adult, and reminded young Fred that he made every day special just by being himself. Sound familiar? It was the same way Mister Rogers closed every show.

15. The sweaters. Every one of the cardigans he wore on the show had been hand-knit by his mother.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Friday, July 25, 2008

Monday, July 14, 2008


Relatives on my Father's side, eating hot dogs before a night out.

All the Trimmings....

This is the last untouched trim in my house...

It was the only "wood-colored" wood left in my entire home. And soon, it will look like this...

I'm one coat into this project, and I think 2 more coats will do it. High gloss paint is so annoying to use, but so worth it when all is said and done.

Tuesday, July 01, 2008


Spent Saturday here...

It was so hot and humid that we spent most of the time in the pavilion, eating ice cream and listening to bands.

Friday, June 20, 2008


This is one of my favorite photographs of my Grandparents. it was taken at Kelly's Lobster House in Holyoke, Massachusetts in 1951 (or 1952.. my mother isn't quite sure.) My grandfather, Thaddeus, is in the upper left and my grandmother, Anastasia, is the gal with the cigarette in the upper right. The photo was taken by one of those roving photographers that restaurants used to often employ. This photo is framed in a tiny cardboard folder with the establishment's logo on the front.

My mother had thought she lost this photo and we searched for years for it. It just recently turned up. This is what happens to pack-rats. They lose things and then they magically reappear, years later.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Pearly Whites

This guy went to the vet yesterday because it appears that his ears are going bald. It turned out to not be a problem and nothing to worry about, BUT the vet mentioned that he needs his teeth cleaned. Ok. No problem.

The I get the quote...


Almost half a grand so my cat can have sparkling chompers?

Friday, June 13, 2008

You don't knock...

This past weekend, my Father installed my side-of-house-oh-look-now-you-can-get-to-the-backyard door. He did this for me for free, because he is awesome. (Hi, Dad!)

He did the whole thing in two days, which i think is pretty amazing. Admittedly, I know nothing about door installation, so I'm not sure if this is an amazing feat, or 2 days is the usual for doors. Whatever, I'm impressed.

This blog post is full of "Dad is great" type stuff for two reasons....
1. He just installed a door in my house, for free. A door that is greatly increasing my quality of life... I'm lazy and now it's much easier to get to my backyard.
2. Sunday is Father's Day.

Onward to photos!...

Here is my Father sitting in the door hole. (I don't know what I find that funny.)

On Saturday, my Father lost his sunglasses and promptly flipped out. Here he is wearing mine so he could continue working outside.. Luckily, we found his shortly thereafter.


Taking a break.

He's really just showing off one of his tattoos here, but you know, I might as well post it. After all, HE PUT A DOOR IN MY HOUSE, IN 90 DEGREE WEATHER. That's amazing.

Happy Father's Day, a bit early, Dad.

(when ya wanna get going on the diner construction, eh? I KID, I KID!)

Friday, June 06, 2008


Tuesday, June 03, 2008

His new game...

The cat I live with is an asshole.

I say "the cat I live with" as opposed to "my pet cat" because he doesn't seem to think he is a pet, and referring to him as a "pet" would lead you, dear reader, to believe that the cat knows his place in this household. "Pet" indicates that I have jurisdiction over him in some way. I don't. He does whatever he damn well pleases and gets away with it because he is adorable. The bastard.


For the past week, every time I walk into the bathroom, he jumps roughly 4 feet into the air and attaches himself to the bathroom doorframe. He hangs there like a monkey halfway up a tree. While he hangs there, on the doorframe, he gives me the "What is your problem?' face, EVERY SINGLE TIME.

The door frame is clawed to hell now. Wonderful.

So, I decide I'm going to photograph this recent act of cat defiance, but have been unsuccessful thus far. It seems that he is on to me, and won't repeat his jerk carnival for the camera. If I am able to get a photo of it, I'll post it... but don't hold yer breath.

He's the Michigan J. Frog of cats.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Sales Gal

...at The South End Open Market, pretending I'm a "people person."

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Side Door

This past weekend, while I was selling Bag Lunch balms at the South End Open Market, my father came down for the weekend and started prepping the side of my house for the new door that he's going to install.

He's going to order the door for me sometime this week and come down to Suburbia and install it. The odd thing is that I don't get to pick it out, He said that he knows what sort of door I want and that he'll just order it.

When I asked him about it, he just said "What? You're just going to paint the damn thing pink anyway right?"

Oh, he knows me too well.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Busy Bee.

Since I'm so busy getting bag lunch ready for this year's Open Market season, I've had nothing to write about on this blog. I've been pouring and labeling lip balm every day for the past 2-3 weeks and nothing amusing or amazing happens when I'm doing that... so no blog posts.

Opening weekend is this weekend, so after that, I can return to my regular life and you know... actually do something outside of my house.

In the meantime, check out one of my favorite blogs...

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Spring has sprung

The tulips in my front gardens have bloomed.

This is sheer luck for them though, as I have no green thumb and don't actually do any gardening whatsoever. My mother drives to my house every few weeks in the spring and summer months and tends to my gardens because she enjoys that sort of thing.

I agreed to let her do this under the stipulation that she can not get angry at me when these plants die under my watch. Because they will. I am horrible.

Monday, May 05, 2008

Here we go...

With the warmer weather approaching, I have a long list of house projects i want to get through this summer:

1. Install backyard access door.
Currently, the only way to get to my backyard is out through the front door and then walking the entire length of my house via my driveway. It's really a hassle if you're sitting on my deck and need to run into the house for something... you'll need to walk down my driveway and squeeze by my car to get to the front door. How irritating.

2. Stain deck.
The deck wood has "settled" and now can be stained. I want to get this done before it gets really hot out.

3. Continue with the diner construction in the basement.
Currently, the walls have been painted and that's about it. I've told myself that the backyard access door is more important and that I'm not going to work on the diner at all until that door is in. There is a LOT to do for this, and once the door is in, I'll dive into this.

4. Paint the exterior trim under all the windows.
I will probably not actually do this. I want to, but it seems like it's going to be a giant pain.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Back to the Eastern Seaboard

I'm back from Vegas. Here are a few photos...

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Bright Light City

Tomorrow morning, I'm going on vacation with my friends Myk and Allison. I'm going to the annual Viva Las Vegas Rockabilly Weekender. Four days of music, car shows, burlesque, and vintage clothing vendors.

I'm even closing Bag Lunch while I'm away. In the 5 years I've owned Bag Lunch, I've never closed shop for any amount of time. It's odd. I won't be checking Bag Lunch emails or processing orders or anything. Whenever I go away for the weekend or anything like that, I generally still run Bag Lunch from wherever I am. But not this time...I'm going to be 100% on vacation.

Also, although "Swingers" is one of my favorite movies, I'm going to refrain from quoting any part of that movie while I'm there. I'm no hack.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Needle in the groove

The record player I ordered a few days ago arrived today. It's very exciting because i haven't been able to listen to any of my records for roughly two years.

You see... two years ago i was living with a fellow with a record player, so i never replaced the one I broke in college... then WE broke up and obviously he took his player with him. For some reason I was ok with being record player-less for the entire time I've lived in my house. Gah!

Well no more! I'll be spending the evening catching up with all my old vinyl friends.

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

The future is NOW.

Everything about this is awesome....

Sadly, this is not yet available in Massachusetts.

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

The elusive picnic basket

I would like a picnic basket just like this:

You would think it would be easy to find a simple picnic basket. It's not. It's in fact, very difficult.

A lot of picnic baskets that I've seen look like tiny wicker suitcases. I don't want to walk around looking like I'm in some sort of prairie mob, about to close a deal.

Also, a lot of picnic baskets come with a bunch of forks and plates and other tools for eating. Don't need these. Every time I've ever been on a picnic, I've simply removed my sandwich from it's plastic baggie and eaten it. I'm classy like that. If you need to lug a bunch of plates and forks and glasses out for your picnic, why don't you just save yourself the trouble and stay in your kitchen.

All I want is a picnic basket with no bells or whistles, that doesn't come with a bunch of useless crap, and opens from the top in two pieces like the picture above..

Apparently, I've asked for too much.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

status: busy

I haven't updated this blog in quite a while. Sooo, here's what I've been up to:

got Ink pushed into my skin • stung IN THE NECK by a hornet • organized every closet in my house • got even more ink pushed into my skin • drove to Northampton for lunch with a friend • went to a diner with my Father • drove around the back roads of Amherst • poured some lip balm • settled my open market schedule for the summer • went to a party where seven dogs were in attendance • painted the basement • started packing for vegas • watched the most fucked movie I've ever seen • new Auto Club album • ice cream with Myk • ate a hamburger within a grilled cheese sandwich • taxes are done • more lunches with other friends • new sneakers • live music

Friday, March 14, 2008


I have a closet in my kitchen that has become a Fibber McGee and Molly situation. Over the past year I have simply just packed that closet with random junk. It's bad. Opening the door reveals a solid wall of STUFF.

But... Yesterday I cleaned it out! I found all sorts of things that I had been looking for... a fiber optic christmas tree, some painting that I'm going to re-purpose for the diner I'm building, and all sorts of plastic crap bought at flea markets among other things.

I organized the entire closet with new shelving and everything has it's own nook. It's now an obsessive compulsive's dream closet.

What an exciting life I lead. sigh.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Yes, it is true.

This comic came from nataliedee.com.

Monday, March 10, 2008

Down for the count.

On Saturday, 2 friends and I went to visit Paul, so he could push some ink into our skin.

Curly decides he wants to go second. So Jay goes first and gets a tattoo on the back of his neck. Quick and painless, like an old ink veteran.

Next, Paul draws up the stencil for our first-timer, slaps it on his arm and then Curly plunks down in the chair, ready for his first tattoo ever.

Paul gets two lines done and notices Curly starting to fidget and get clammy.

Paul asks how he's doing, and Curly says " I think I'm gonna..." and before he can finish his sentence it's LIGHTS OUT!

Curly passed out cold.

He's only out for maybe a minute. All of a sudden, Curly's eyes shoot open, he forgets where he is and what's going on, and starts flailing his arms around, mumbling "I gotta get out of here! I gotta get out of here," while trying to jump out of the chair. He's flailing his arms around so wildly that Paul thinks he's going to punch him. Paul is blocking his head so Curly doesn't deck him, Jay is laughing and I'm running around looking for orange juice. (Orange juice is really good to drink during tattoo sessions as it's high sugar content is great for replenishing energy that you use up when your body fights the tattoo pain. Also, it's delicious.)

Paul keeps saying, "Curly. Curly. Don't try to get up, you'll just fall over. Curly. Curly." Finally, Paul just grabs him by the shoulders and pushes him into the seat so he doesn't start running around and injure himself.

Curly then realizes where he is, settles down, and apologizes. Paul assures him that it happens sometimes, and not to worry. Paul gets him some cool towels for his neck and face, and some orange juice to drink.

Half an hour later, Paul starts again on Curly's arm and it was no problem. He's already talking about getting another one. hehehe

Friday, March 07, 2008

I call this...."Blurry cat in sweater"

This photograph of Dolemite in his party sweater isn't blurry because he couldn't sit still. It's blurry because I was laughing too hard and thus couldn't hold the camera steady.

He's actually really good at posing in his sweater. This is due largely to the fact that when he's wearing it, he thinks his legs don't work. As soon as that sweater is on him, he just stands there, motionless, or flops onto his back. It's weird.

Thursday, March 06, 2008

High School Hellcats

"Cry Baby" is one of my favorite movies. I've heard rumors of this musical for years and now it's finally happening. It's on Broadway starting March 15th. I'm so excited.

Monday, March 03, 2008


Since about January first, I have been meaning to take down my Christmas tree. And This weekend, I actually did.

In my defense, my Christmas tree is not actually very Christmas-themed. It's pink and decorated with candy, so having it up that long isn't really that bad... it's not really very "Holiday-ish.". It's not green with Santa heads and reindeer or anything... because, you know, THAT would be tacky.

So now it's sitting in a box on my porch. I haven't taken it down to the basement yet because I don't want to rush it. Baby steps, man, baby steps.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Rather disappointing news...

Reposted from the interwebs...

"After much thought and consideration, The Road Agents have decided to end the annual Hot Rod Rumble on a permanent basis. We know this news will be a disappointment to many. We will miss it just as much as you, however as some of you may or may not know, many of us in the club have other projects and/or businesses that are taking priority. The show was a huge responsibility and a lot of hard work to put on every year, but as much as we enjoyed doing it, our personal lives were suffering. This combined with the fact that the Elks Lodge has gone bankrupt and we will no longer be able to use the grounds for the show, has brought us to the decision to call it quits. (Finding a new location is not the big issue here.) I am sure you will all understand.

We would like to whole-heartedly thank everyone who has supported us for the past nine years (8 shows) and made the show not only memorable, but also made the rest of the country stand up and take a second look at the East Coast and the cool rods and customs we drive. We couldn’t have done it without you!

Lastly, I would like to emphasize that the end of the Rumble does not mean the end of the Road Agents Car Club! We look forward to finally getting out there and hitting up and supporting other shows this summer. We also have a few things up our sleeves for the future that we will post on our web site, so keep an eye out for them!

Again, a HUGE Thanks to everyone who has supported the show, especially those who have been with us since day one! It’s been a blast!

Luke Karosi"

Monday, February 25, 2008

Simply Smashing!

On Friday, snow fell from the sky.

As I was pulling into my driveway after driving home from work, I hit a patch of ice and skidded into my garden retaining wall. The wall shattered and stones flew into the air cartoon style, then scattered all over the sidewalk. (If you look at the cartoony drawing of my house at the top of this page, you can see the wall I'm talking about.)

I'm not sure if there is any damage to my car, because I drive a crappy Seabring and I don't care. It still runs, and I'm not all that concerned with it's cosmetics. It's a Seabring. It was ugly when it was new. Dents could only IMPROVE the car...maybe give it some character.

Anyway, I attempted to rebuild the broken stone wall on Saturday, but there was too much snow around to really see what I was doing. Plus, the stones are very heavy, and have you seen my arms? Wimpy!

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Obsessive collage

I heard about this book today and it seems really really neat...

Apparently it has been...
"painstakingly assembled from 40,000 fragments of text snipped from women's magazines."

Rawle is a writer and collage artist who used publications from the 1960s -- plus scissors and glue -- to create his text.


This looks great.

Backdoor Dan

Last night at three in the morning I was woken up by the sound of rustling and clanking and other noises that, in my semi-awake, groggy state, sounded like my home was being broken into.

I did what any paranoid person would do... I grabbed the phone off my night stand, hid under my bedcovers and listened very purposely in order to try and determine what was happening. I came to the conclusion that I wasn't being burgled and that the noise was happening somewhere outside.

I should add that I fully blame my burglar paranoia on McGruff the Crime Dog. His "Take a Bite Outta Crime" campaign that saturated my brain when I was a kiddo has traumatized me. I'm constantly checking to make sure doors are locked and that windows are secure. It's awful.


I crawled out from my blankety hideout, ambled into my kitchen and looked out the window. What I saw was probably the dumbest thing my jerk neighbors have done, thus far...

My jerk neighbor was installing a new exterior door to his house, at THREE IN THE MORNING.


I'm not generally bothered my noise all that much, having previously lived in Allston where ruckus thrives like rats, but cutting through the WALL OF A BUILDING at that hour is inconsiderate. And dumb.

But mostly inconsiderate.

Monday, February 18, 2008

This makes me oh so happy....

Friday, February 15, 2008

One piece at a time

Yesterday as I was driving home from work, I lost a hubcap.

Actually, I didn't lose it. I know where it is. It's on the side of the road on Route 16.

My hubcap decided to liberate itself when I accidently drove over (or in this case, INTO) a giant pothole that I'm going to assume was deep enough that if you peered in, you would be able to see the earth's core.

I drove back that way this morning to see if I could find my runaway hubcap, but alas, it was gone.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Your time has come

I've been in denial all winter, but the time has finally come to replace my heating system. The boiler has simply become too unreliable. I have had to get the damn thing serviced twice in the last week.

One night last week I came home and Dolemite was standing in the kitchen all puffed up because he was cold. Poor cat. I can generally gage how long the heat has not been working by the "puffed up-ness" of his coat. It would seem that the heat had not been working all day. I hardly notice anymore. I think my blood has thickened and I"ve become impervious to the cold.

Once my current tank of oil is gone, Orville (the boiler) will be put to pasture.

I'll be switching over the house from oil to gas, as gas requires less service and I already have a gas line in for my clothes dryer and stove.

"They" say that everything breaks the first two years you are in a new house. This coming June marks two years, so hopefully this will be the last thing that will go. I hope so, because I can't even think of anything else that COULD break in my house, unless a tree falls on my roof or something.

I hope I didn't just jinx myself.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Someburger loves me....

I got this email this morning....

Be still, my beating taste buds.

Friday, February 08, 2008

Nice package

I love love love this packaging....

Friday, February 01, 2008

The daughter of the king.

Happy Birthday, Lisa Marie Presley.

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Nothing to see here...move along...

Last night, the doorbell rang...

random guy: Hi. Is your Mom or Dad home?

me: Eh, No. (I haven't actually lived with my parents in nine years.)

random guy: Oh. Are you the home owner?

me: Yep.

random guy: Do you live alone?

me: No. (I always say this when asked by strangers. No one needs to know whether or not I live alone.)

random guy: Well, we're washing carpets for homeowners.

me: I have no carpets in here. (I lie!)

random guy: No throw rugs? nothing?

me: No. Nothing . (oooh! I lie again!)

random guy: Uh, ok. Uh, Sorry I thought you were younger than me.

He then shuffled down my front steps and scurried to the next house.


Thursday, January 24, 2008


Health Ledger passed away this week, which bothers me more than it should. I'm not a big fan of his or anything, so I really don't know why this has bothered me as it has. I must say though, that I've been geekily excited for his "Joker" this coming Summer, and now it will be a bit odd to watch I think.

Bettie Page is deathly ill.

She has been moved from a hospital to a nursing home and is currently unable to speak. She is suffering/recovering from pneumonia and a kidney infection. She is 84 years old. According to her brother, it's not looking good.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

More crap I need...

Even though this isn't ceramic*, I need this for my house....

A cheeseburger drink coaster set! I have collected a lot of fake food over the years, and most of it has no purpose whatsoever. This cheeseburger is actually functional!

*I collect ceramic cheeseburgers. I don't know why. I just do.